Friday, January 18, 2008

Confessions of an Addict


Hi. My name is Paul, and I'm a pianoholic. It all started when I was in elementary school. You never think it'll happen to you. I mean, you hear of other people who have that problem, and you think "That'll never be me". Your friends are all doing it, and they're razzing you telling you that "It's not a big deal. It's not gonna kill you just to hang out...what, are you better than us?"

"No."

"Okay then, come on." So before you know it your'e listening to it and you start justifying it to yourself. I mean, it's not like I'm playing the piano, I'm just listening. What's the harm in that?

Then your best friend's parents are out of town and he invites you over to party. You get there and everyone's playing the piano. Even people you thought would never go near a piano are there. People you thought were cool, they're pounding the keys just like everyone else. So, you think to yourself "Well I can just stay over on this side of the room and just listen. I don't have to go over there and do anything". But before you know it, you're over leaning on the piano and it seems like everyone is so outgoing, and friendly. Friends that were usually shy, and not very social were playing the piano like it was nobody's business. So you play a note. It feels good. So you play another.


Then the next day at school you hear the piano everywhere. You hear other people playing and they seem so happy and with it. You start dreaming about the next time you'll be around a piano just to play one note. You find yourself sneaking into the band room to get a few notes in and then you're out of there before anyone knows. And this is how it starts.

A few months go by and you feel like just a few notes a day is'nt enough anymore. You're wanting to lay down a whole chord. And then that's not enough, and you're now playing several chords in a row. You find yourself saying to your new friends, "Hey one note's not gonna kill ya". Now your whole life is consumed by playing the piano, and not just the same 'ol chords... now you're getting creative and figuring out what other chords might go good with the chords you already play.

This is the point of no return. You're not only playing the hard stuff, but now you're coming up with your own, recording it and selling it to others. You're not selling your stuff legitimately. You're independent. You're peddling your own compositions to your friends and neighbors... kids... work associates in the underground parking garage. You don't even know who you are anymore. You live from gig to gig, always anticipating the next big fix.

As an adult, it seems like the big excitement over the piano is gone. Now people bring up piano like it's a five-letter word. And where are all my high school buddies who used to play? It seems they all either quit, or are dead. And to think it all started with just one note.




I should have learned the guitar.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Daddy, people who play the guitar will tell you the same thing, "IT all started with just one little note". Luv, Kaylan

Unknown said...

ya dats right. dats my daddie. i gotta say tho mi favortie pix on this one is the one of lando. he is so freggin cute. haha :D but ya...i wish i got addicted as much as you did. well i mean i probably would if i could actually play fun songs. songs that actually make sence to me and are fun. ya kno. well im excited for you to teach me soon. ill try to be practicing more. ily daddie.

Unknown said...

haha and in one of these pix is when you had your lil ponytail. that was HALARIOUS. ill never forget that. haha

Tiffany Berg Coughran said...

Ohhhhhh - look at how cute Landon was!!! (IS!!!) Love that pic! Even as I type this honey you are downstairs playing your heart out. It really is a sickness - and we love you for it! Thank you for being the band leader in our home - we make beautiful music together ; )

Bev Robison said...

OMG, we are so NOT related. I'm just not a funny person, but you?...hmmm...maybe you were adopted? I had to look twice at the picture of Landon...I thought it was YOU when you were little. He looks just like you! Keep playing, and we'll keep praying. Love you, bro!

pauL said...

Bev, are you mocking my addiction? Five minutes ago I was sure I could get through all 12 steps... but I'm not so sure now.
pauL

Gary said...

Paul, I can think of many worse things to be addicted to...booze...alcohol...harmonicas...flutes...and various other wind instruments... You addiction is at least tolerable, and semi-treatable! Hey...ya ever thought about picking up a banjo?! :-) Haha!

Bev Robison said...

any new addictions to brag about? I'm seriously considering checking myself into Photographers Anonymous. It's disgusting. I am so hooked.

Anonymous said...

Excellent. Very funny. Fighting the urge to play as I type this.